from my reading for "Christian Ethics"

from "Theological Foundations for Male-Female Relationships", by Stanley J. Grenz
(Journal of the Evangelical Theological Society, 41.04 pp 615-630)

"To summarize our second conclusion: Godly relationships between men and women emerge as we direct our life together toward the highest human task--namely, reflecting the divine character and thereby being the image of God. God's goal for us arises out of the procession of the third Trinitarian person, the Holy Spirit who, as the concretization of the divine love, is the one who creates that character in us. God's loving character becomes visible as we love one another, whether as partners who share the exclusive love relationship of marriage or as participants in the more inclusive nonmarital bonds that bring persons--both male and female--together within the context of Christ's fellowship. Within this fellowship our task is to help others, in the words of Vanier, to 'grow toward wholeness and to discover their place, and eventually exercise their gifts, in a network of friendship.' This requires, he adds, 'the integration of one's sexuality in a vision of fellowship and friendship. It implies that each one, man or woman, in his or her sexual being, must learn to love others, entering into relationships of communion..., tenderness and service, using their genital sexuality only in that particular covenant which is blessed by God.'"

(Jean Vanier, Man and Woman, p 97-98)