storm.

there's a beautiful storm north of here. if i weren't so afraid of my own thoughts, i would sit outside and watch it. (or if i had a roommate instead of living with parents.)





my whole life, i've lived withing other people's definitions. i know my actions will always be defined and put in boxes that will somehow describe who i am. but i am tired of deciding what to do based on what boxes it will look like i fit into. some friends have been talking about the freedom they have found in the verse "if i were still trying to please men, i would not be pleasing God" (dianne's paraphrase). i think i want to step out of more boxes. i don't fit into many of them, anyway, except all the "other" boxes.

i have a degree in a subject i am passionate about and is fairly unique, but i'm not passionate about it enough to pursue a career in it.

i love Jesus. but i don't love the american church, or the evangelical right, or my culture's definitions of Christianity, religion, or spirituality. or really, my church's definition of Christianity.

i am a terrible know-it-all with no "ambition" and not much "direction". i'm almost 24 and i've never kissed anyone. i love my cat and am a product of my generation in ways i'm discovering every day.

and that's just the start.